Princess Warrior (1989)

“Sisters from the planet Vulkaria teleport themselves to Earth to investigate and report back in order to prove to their mother, the planet’s ruler, that they are worth of becoming Queen.”

– Anonymous, IMDB.

Princess Warrior is brought to us by Vista Street Entertainment. Vista Street Entertainment’s previous films include the Witchcraft series, Time Barbarians, Dr. Hackenstein, and Bikini Med School. Princess Warrior is the first film directed by Lindsay Norgard, who’s only other director credit is 1992’s Homeboys. Princess Warrior was also the first film for actress Sharon Lee Jones, who plays Princess Ovule. Sharon Lee Jones went on to appear in 9 1/2 Ninjas, Leaping Leprechauns!, and a small role on TV’s Night Court.

Some thoughts from me (Potential spoilers below)…
This was a movie that was brought to my attention by the fine folks at RedLetterMedia, who covered the film in one of their videos (Hence the nod to Night Court in the above paragraph). If you are a small child who has found my blog, please don’t watch their video (And also, maybe don’t read the rest of this blog post).

Right off the bat, Princess Warrior is a pretty hilarious experience, top-to-bottom. It’s that perfect mess of bizarre visuals and story that I’m always on the hunt for. It’s obvious that the director and writer were fully attempting to make a funny film. There’s just too many weird things in this one for it to not be intentional… Things like how character names include Ovule, Exzema, Ricketsia, and Bullemia. There’s also the plot irrelevant wet t-shirt contest that is so long, the DVD scene selections have to list it as “Wet T-shirt Contest 1” and “Wet T-shirt Contest 2”. 

Usually when someone is deliberately trying to make a bad movie there’s a weird undercurrent to the film, the feeling like someone is trying too hard to get a laugh. With Princess Warrior, regardless of how intentional or unintentional the laughs are, it’s still a hilariously bad movie. I’m tempted to try and check out some of their other films to see if there’s an identifiable pattern of quality that might shed light on how intentional or unintentional some of the things in Princess Warrior are. 

Honestly, for a movie like this you’d expect it to go full tilt, but unexpectedly they do reign it somewhat, which is my way of saying I’m surprised that we didn’t get double the nudity that we did.


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